Saturday, January 22, 2011

Who wears the pants?!

When I tweeted about my next post on 'women earning more than men/partner' (husband, boy-friend, companion etc.), I got a couple of nasty calls from friends (because I know so many women who earn more than their companions). Well, calls that were more like threats. 'Hey! dare you write on this!' & 'I'll never talk to you again'. I mean WTH!! Why can't I? It’s not like I'm exposing their deep dark secrets. For starters, my wife earns more than me. And I do not have any issue with it. But I think I'm the only man who does not :-)

Why should a man feel threatened if his lady love earns more? Don't other men earn more than him? So why can't it be a woman? Aren't they as capable if not more? So what’s the big deal I say! Women get the same education, exposure and chances as men. And if they are better for the job then definitely they should earn more!

But to my surprise, apparently it’s indeed a damn big deal! Because not only the man, if married, his parents have an issue with it. They can't see their sonny boy earn less than his wife. They think, 'Hai Ram, Allah, Christ, Guru! What has the world come to!', 'How can a person who's job is to be a home maker and cook, clean and have babies, go out and get a high paying job for herself'. I know of families where the parents have actually gone to the extent of asking the wife to sit at home or take up a job that is less paying than her husband's. And that's provided they know about it ;-) Because I know a few friends, over the years, who have actually hidden the real earnings of their wives from their parents. Isn’t that freaking absurd! But yeah! That's the sad and ugly truth.

I actually know of families who have also made their daughters feel guilty for getting them educated. I mean WTF! In today's day and age where we have women running some of the biggest organisations in the world? Women like Indra Nooyi - Chairperson and CEO of Pepsi Co, Carol Bartz - President and CEO of Yahoo, Chanda Kochchar - CEO & MD ICICI Bank, Naina Lal Kidwai - CEO HSBC India, Andrea Jung - Chairman and CEO of Avon, Sheryl Sandberg - COO Facebook, who would probably laugh if they found out about this absurd perception amongst people.

We men have double standards! We like to talk about equality for women. And when they move ahead of us, we want to drag them down and bound them and keep them at home.

We can't do half the things that women can. They can have successful careers and when at home, they are perfect home makers. We men, come home, sit in front of the TV or computer because we have had a ‘rough, long day’, and just vegetate. While our extremely efficient wives have had an equally long day but still take care of most of the household needs. And honestly, sometimes I feel that even some women are to blame for this forced perception in the society as they agree with their husbands and stay quiet and bear the hardship without standing up for themselves.

Before you start hunting me down, yes I admit even I have been guilty of vegetating as some of you know it too well. But hey, that's long gone in the past. I hope by now you all know who wears the pants in my house, don’t they, Wifey? I Do!

Here’s a big Cheers to all the women in my life.

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