Thursday, September 8, 2011

Thought of the Day - One Thing


One thing is taking up our time and attention. One issue is eating away at our mind. One factor cannot be ignored or pushed aside. Yet, is there so much as one single constructive thing we can do about this? We fear we are helpless. That, though, doesn't make it any easier to turn our attention elsewhere. What we need to know is that we are far from helpless. We are being helped and soon more help will arrive. And it will then be clear that there is, indeed, one very clever thing we can do.

Joke of the Day - Till Diet Do Us Part

Joke Of The Day

A hospital's consulting dietician was giving a lecture to several nurses.

He said, "The crap that we put into our stomachs and consume should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is horrible. Fizzy drinks eat your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables are now "iffy" because of fertilisers and pesticides ... and none of us seem to realize the long-term damage being done by the rotten bacteria in our drinking water.

However, there is one food that is incredibly dangerous, and we all have, or will (likely), eat it at some time in our lives. Now, is anyone here able to tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

A 65-year-old nurse sitting in the front row raised her hand, stood up and said, "wedding cake."

courtesy Guylife

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Joke of The Day - Playing Doctor

Joke Of The Day

A middle-aged man named Morris complained to his friend that making love to his wife was becoming routine and boring.

"Get creative, Morris," his friend said. "Break up the monotony. Why don't you try 'playing doctor' for an hour? That's what I do."

"Sounds great," Morris replied. "But how do you make it last for an hour?"

"It's simple. Just keep her in the waiting room for 55 minutes!"

courtesy Ask Men

Thought of The Day - Confusion

We are not quite sure what we feel, why we feel it, who we feel it about, whether we ought to be feeling it at all, how we can stop ourselves from feeling it, where we ought to go to feel better or when we may just wake up one morning and feel differently. Yet we never find out reassuring answers to all of these questions. At the essence of a conflict is always something rather valuable. To make us feel far better.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Joke OF The Day - Pearly Gates

Joke Of The Day

A minister dies and ascends to the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, a leather jacket, and jeans. Saint Peter looks at him and says, "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you into the Kingdom of Heaven?"

The guy replies, "I'm Joe Cohen. I'm a taxi driver from New York City."

Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi driver, "Take this silken robe and golden staff, and enter the Kingdom."

The taxi driver goes into Heaven with his robe and staff. Next, it's the minister's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am Joseph Snow. I was the pastor of Saint Mary's for the last 43 years."

Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff, and enter the Kingdom."

"Just a minute," says the minister. "That man was only a taxi driver, and he got a silken robe and golden staff. How can this be?"

"Up here, we work by results," says Saint Peter. "While you preached, people slept; while he drove, people prayed."

courtesy ask men

Thought of the day - Chance of a Lifetime

If we feel like hiding under the covers or cowering in a corner, that's just fine. After all, why should we tolerate all that sunshine that's filtering through our front door? Why should we have to be bombarded with good wishes from all the people who love and admire us? And why on earth should we have to endure the wonderful opportunities that keep knocking on our door? The world is out there waiting for us. We have a choice to make - to go out and greet it, or retreat to our shell and miss the chance of a lifetime.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Thought Of The Day - Ghosts n Memories

Ghosts don't just live in haunted houses. Memories hang around wherever they have been left. And sometimes, the scariest echoes of the past are not from some bygone era. No headless knight or ashen lady can upset us as much as an event, a piece of music or a suggestion that takes us back to some painful experience that we have been striving ever since to avoid or forget. Somethings send a cold shiver down our spine. We need to chase it away with the bright light of a smart plan and a clear, confident understanding.